Topic ClosedAdult Humor

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Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 09 2007 at 3:29pm
 A guy was driving down the road pulling a trailer while his wife was in the back taking a shower.  He hit a bump, the trailer bounced and the door opened and his wife flew out, naked, hit her head and died.  The state police showed up and while waiting for the coroner, one of the officers feeling sorry for the dead, naked lady, took off his smokie bear hat and covered her pu**y.  A few minutes later the officer looked over at the dead lady and saw a drunk lift up the hat, take a look, and then start laughing.  Then the drunk did it again, and again started to laugh.  The trooper yelled over, "Hey, why are you doing that and what do you find so damn funny?!"  The drunk replied, "That's the first time I've seen something underneath one of those hats that wasn't a prick."
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tele88 View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 10 2007 at 9:47pm
Originally posted by budd budd wrote:

 A guy was driving down the road pulling a trailer while his wife was in the back taking a shower.  He hit a bump, the trailer bounced and the door opened and his wife flew out, naked, hit her head and died.  The state police showed up and while waiting for the coroner, one of the officers feeling sorry for the dead, naked lady, took off his smokie bear hat and covered her pu**y.  A few minutes later the officer looked over at the dead lady and saw a drunk lift up the hat, take a look, and then start laughing.  Then the drunk did it again, and again started to laugh.  The trooper yelled over, "Hey, why are you doing that and what do you find so damn funny?!"  The drunk replied, "That's the first time I've seen something underneath one of those hats that wasn't a prick."



Slick Willy...The SLANDEROUS Bastard's
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 13 2007 at 3:25pm
 Heard the same joke 35 years ago in basic training, but instead of a state trooper in was a drill sergeant.  Just as funny now as it was back then.  Thanks for the memory.LOLClapClapLOLLOL
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 23 2007 at 3:24pm

Bobby Knight dies and goes to heaven.  St. Peter meets him at The Pearly Gates and says, "Follow me Bobby and I'll show you where you're going to spend the rest of eternity."  They walk down the road a little piece come up on this hill and Bobby Knight sees this mansion with a basketball court in the back painted in Texas Tech Red and the Texas Tech mascot was doing flips on the court.  St. Peter said, "Well, this is it Bobby.  Where you're spending the rest of eternity."  Bobby Knight said, "This is great!"  But then he looked a little further down the road and saw a mansion about ten times the size of his, a basketball court in the back painted in Kentucky Blue, the 8 National Championship banners hanging on lines around the court.  Bobby Knight looked at St Peter, disgusted and said,"Well, I didn't know Tubby Smith died, too."  St. Peter said, "Naw, Tubby didn't die.  That's where God lives."

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Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 24 2007 at 11:28am

This is an old one from when Bobby was still in Indiana, but it's still funny.

On a trip to India Bobby Knight is given a bolt of rare red Indian silk. It is very exquisit so Bobby decides to have a red jacket made as soon as he gets home. He goes to his tailor in Indiana but his tailor says, "I'm sorry Mr. Knight. This is the most beautiful cloth we have ever worked with, but there simply is not enough of it to make your jacket." Bobby can hardly believe it so he tries another local tailor and gets the same answer. He is very disappointed.

Later in the year he finds himself in Lexington KY playing the Kentucky Wildcats. While walking around Lexington he passes by a tailor shop and on a whim bring the bolt of red silk inside. He asks the tailor, "Is there any way at all you can make me a red jacket with this?" The tailor opens the silk, unfolds it, examines it, take a few measurements and says, "Sure! In fact there's enough here to make two jackets." Astonished, Bobby Knight says, "I don't understand, I took this same bolt of cloth to several tailors back home in Indiana, and they all said there wasn't even enough to make even ONE jacket, and you say you can make TWO? What gives?"

The KY tailor smiles and says, "You see Mr. Knight, your not as big a man down here in Kentucky as you are in Indiana"

"The secret to enjoying your job is to find a hobby that's worse"
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 18 2007 at 7:44pm

 How can ya tell if when a jewish princess gets an orgasm...

She drops her nail file.....

"Dead men tell no tales!!!".....Freddy B
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 27 2007 at 12:40pm
The mom calls the husband a "bastard" and then the dad calls the wife a "bitch." Billy goes to his mom and says, "Mom what's a bitch and a bastard?" The mom says, "Well, a bitch is a lady and a bastard is a gentlemen." Later, Billy goes outside and listens to his neighbors, and hears "Put your penis in my vagina!" So Billy goes to his mom and says, "Mom whats a penis and vagina?" His moms says, "Well Billy, a penis is a hat and a vagina is a coat." Billy later sees his dad shaving and cuts himself and says "sh*t" and Billy said, "Dad, what's sh*t?" His dad says, "Well Billy, sh*t is a type of shaving cream." Billy goes to see his mom cutting the turkey and his mom cuts her finger and says f**k!" and Billy says to his mom, "Mom what's f**k?" "Well Billy, f**k is a way of cutting the turkey." Later, guests arrive and Billy goes to them and says, "Hello bitches and bastards, may I take your penises and vaginas? My dad's upstairs wiping sh*t off his face, and my mom is in the kitchen f**king the turkey!" 

Edited by ChowderMonkey - Mar 27 2007 at 12:41pm
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